Jenster's Musings

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

A Little Musical Nostalgia

This is all Kristie's fault. I've been playing over at YouTube and came across this little gem. And this is pre-MTV - 1975, to be exact. So what memories does this bring back for you?


Mused by Jenster :: 9:27 PM :: 3 People musing:

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Checkups and January Reading

I saw the plastic surgeon today for a routine post-surgical checkup. Everything is as it should be and I was released to do whatever I feel like. So I think next week I'm going to start swimming. The thought of gliding through the water without a care as to where my boob will end up is thrilling.

Tomorrow I have to get that nasty injection. Todd cleared his schedule so he can take me - mostly because we didn't know if I would be able to drive tomorrow or not. But I'm very glad he'll be there to hold my hand, even if he did say he was going to pinch me hard so I won't even notice the needle.

JANUARY READING LIST

I read (and enjoyed) six books in January:

Splendid by Julia Quinn

Winter Garden by Adele Ashworth

Book of the Seven Delights by Betina Krahn

Darkfever by Karen Marie Moning

The Book of True Desires by Betina Krahn

Simply Unforgettable by Mary Balogh

I'm currently reading The Queen's Fool by Philippa Gregory and have the strong desire to rent the movie Elizabeth and watch it again now that I have a better idea of what rolls the different characters played.

Mused by Jenster :: 6:23 PM :: 1 People musing:

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Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Lesson Learned

Now that it's truly winter here we're all suffering from the dry air itch. DH bought a bottle of Gold Bond Medicated lotion and he thinks it works pretty good.


Todd would advise not to rub it in too high on the leg as it has a tendency to spread somewhat, causing certain, more tender parts to tingle more than what is considered enjoyable.



So today after my shower, wherein I gleefully shaved both the upper and lower portions of my legs whilst singing "Ain't Misbehavin'" near to the top of my lungs, I decided to try the Gold Bond Medicated lotion because I'm tired of itching. I am happy to report that I am no longer itching. No. I'm burning. That cold kind of burn you get from BenGay. From the tops of my thighs (not too high, though) to the tips of my toes. I have that cool, minty fresh feeling one gets from swishing with Listerine as though someone spit a mouthfull all down my legs.

I choose to look at this as a learning experience and not an example of just one more idiotic episode of my life. And as such, I want to share my mistake with others in an effort to keep them from making the same mistake. I'm all about serving others...

Mused by Jenster :: 1:02 PM :: 11 People musing:

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Monday, January 29, 2007

Poor Ol' Bessie's On Her Last Leg...

... or tire, as the case may be.

We have a '98 Dodge Grand Caravan (Bessie). She's been a great car, even though we've had to rebuild the transmission twice. She has over 120,000 miles on her and, while she's still getting us where we need to go, little things keep going wrong. So we're in the process of looking for a new car. We haven't had a car payment in a while and I really like it this way. But, alas, we'll be having to make a car payment in the near future.

This is what I want -
Yeah, yeah. I know it's unrealistic. I could only take one person at a time with me. Which, when you think about it, has its advantages. Oh. And there's the matter of price.


The car payment I feel I'm willing to make would probably get us this -

For those of you who are too young to know what this is, it's a Pinto. Ever heard of it??



This is what we're seriously looking at, though. It's a 2007 Saturn Outlook.


We won't be doing anything for a couple of months and it's possible we'll change our minds before then, but as for now I'm daydreaming about a road trip in my new Ocean Mist Outlook with a sunroof. Hope it won't end up being that Pinto afterall!

Mused by Jenster :: 6:00 PM :: 6 People musing:

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Sunday, January 28, 2007

Let's Have Some Church

Seeing as how it's Sunday and seeing as how I can't catch any fleeting thoughts long enough to post something coherent, I thought I'd post a little MercyMe. Taylor and I saw them on a Wednesday night last April in a small and intimate venue (our church) and it was a life-altering experience. On our way home after the concert Taylor said, "That was the best worship service I've ever been to." Amazing words coming from a 14-year-old.



Here With Me written and performed by MercyMe



So Long Self written and performed by MercyMe

Mused by Jenster :: 7:16 PM :: 1 People musing:

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Thursday, January 25, 2007

Flying With Small Children

I’m sure by now everyone has heard about the family with the three-year-old daughter who was kicked off their flight because the child was throwing a tantrum. According to an email survey at Good Morning America, my opinion is in the distinct minority. The overwhelming majority was on the side of the airline.

I do understand that the plane cannot take off until everyone is buckled in their seat and apparently, the little girl was having none of that. I also understand that it’s the pilot’s prerogative to remove anyone from the plane before take off who is being disruptive. I get all that.

I guess the problem I have is with the attitude of so many people who made such ridiculous comments as, “If the parents can’t control their child they have no business on a plane,” or “Obviously the brat needs more discipline,” etc.

People, please. I don’t care how good a parent is or how well-behaved a child is. Somewhere, sometime that angel is going to have a fit. The rare tantrum is not an indicator of bad parenting. Of course, when your child does this in a public arena you feel the need to explain, “This never happens! He/she is usually so well behaved! I really am a good parent!!”

Getting on an airplane with an infant or toddler is, at best, a crap shoot. So many times the change in cabin pressure is painful on their tiny little ears. Also, I think it’s hard for them to understand that just because there’s room for them to run around, they have to stay in the seat. And depending on circumstances – sometimes beyond the parents’ control – if the child is hungry or tired, well, fuhgetaboutit.

I know nothing about these particular parents or child. For all we know they may spoil her relentlessly and her conniption was a common occurrence. By the same token, however, this may have been a one time deal and the poor baby just chose the wrong time to throw it.

All this brought to mind a time when I was getting ready to fly to California with Taylor. Todd had gone to a conference the week before and Taylor and I were meeting him there and staying with his parents. Taylor was 14-months old.

I was in the bathroom getting ready and he was in my room, playing quietly. That in itself should have been cause for alarm. Instead I just thanked my lucky stars he was being so good and continued with my preparations.

My packed suitcase was lying opened on the floor, waiting for the last bit of toiletries. I had a jumbo, family pack of tampons in the suitcase and when I walked out of the bathroom, there was Taylor, sitting on the floor, holding a tampon and smacking the bottom of the applicator so the tampon would shoot out of the top like a rocket. There were tampons all over the place.

When I called my mother-in-law before we left and told her about it she suggested I take a bunch on the plane to keep him quiet and occupied. LOL

My children both flew several times by the time they were three or four – Taylor first at 14 months and Katie first at 10 months. My memory says they both behaved very well on the plane, but it’s possible I’ve wiped away anything humiliating and created my own reality.

Mused by Jenster :: 9:50 AM :: 11 People musing:

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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

We're Having a Baby!!

Well, not WE specifically. WE as in Todd's brother, Tim, and his wife, Rachele. But wait. It gets better. They're having twins!!SmileyCentral.com

Tim (or Timmy, as I still think of him) was 11 when Todd and I started dating so he's been my little brother for a very long time and I have a bit of a soft spot for him. We were thrilled when he married Rachele a few years ago because they compliment each other so nicely. She's smart and funny (and has mad organizational skillz) and I think they're great for each other.

They called us the other night to let us know they were pregnant with twins. Seeing as how Katie is the youngest in the family, it's definitely time for a baby or two. So nice of them to be accommodating like that, dontcha think??

The only problem with all of this is that they live about 3,000 miles away so who knows when I'll get to see those little bundles of joy. Thank goodness for email and digital cameras - and Rachele's mad organizational skillz because I have no doubt we'll be kept current with pictures.

Congratulations, Tim and Rachele!! We love you!!!

Mused by Jenster :: 9:58 AM :: 8 People musing:

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Tuesday, January 23, 2007

WOO HOO!!!

SmileyCentral.com

My mom had her last radiation treatment yesterday!! She still has to have Herceptin treatments every three weeks and we're not sure how long that's going to last. But she's finished chemo, she's finished radiation and her hair is starting to grow back. What could be better??

Mused by Jenster :: 5:28 PM :: 2 People musing:

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Sunday, January 21, 2007

THIS Is Where I Grew Up



This is Redondo Beach with Torrance Beach and then Palos Verdes in the background. If it was clear enough or the angle was a little different you'd be able to see a faint outline of Catalina Island just past the peninsula. It looks to me that the truck is probably at about Avenue C (wouldn't you say, Rowena?) and I hung out at Avenue I, just around the first bend there.

Isn't it gorgeous? Okay. I didn't actually "grow up" on the beach, but I did spend nearly every summer day of my teenage years here. From 10:00 in the morning until about 4:00 in the afternoon. These days consisted of sitting and chatting with friends, rollerskating on the bike path, playing volleyball and either body surfing or boogy boarding. It was a splendid way to spend my summers.

As soon as I was able to drive, my friend, Cindy, and I would drive to the beach and roller skate from Torrance Beach to Hermosa Beach and back nearly every day after school, weather permitting. And because it IS Southern California, that was the majority of the time.

This particular photo was taken from the Esplanade. When I was feeling that typical teenage angst I would sit on a bench overlooking the ocean and watch the sunset. There's a peace that comes with seeing such beauty - a small glimpse into the glory of God. Sometimes it was almost overwhelming and I knew if it was any more beautiful I wouldn't be able to handle it. But somehow it put my problems into perspective.

When I got married at the age of 22 and moved 1600 miles away, THIS is what I missed. Oh, of course I missed my family and my friends. That just goes without saying. But as for what I missed about California - this is it. It was a part of me as sure as my brown hair and sarcasm.

I left Cali nearly 19 years ago and there are times I still miss it. The kids and I enjoyed the Jersey shore last summer and I felt some of the same thrill, but it wasn't MY beach or MY ocean. Or maybe it's because I'm older and that was MY time.

Regardless, it was a great way to grow up and I'm so glad it was my life.

**sigh** Thanks for walking down memory lane with me. It's so much better with someone else!

Mused by Jenster :: 11:56 AM :: 11 People musing:

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Saturday, January 20, 2007

It's the Little Things

I'm feeling so content right now. This is why:

1. I'm wearing very comfy pink thermal jammies with sage green stars, sage green fuzzy socks, pink slippers and a pink robe (the whole matching thing is making me happy);

2. I'm reading Darkfever (I'm sucked in and will probably have to finish it before can get any sleep tonight);

3. I'm drinking a coveted White Chocolate Mocha (my first in over three weeks);

4. There's a burning Clean Linen Yankee Candle on the ledge next to me, filling the air with aromatic joy (Todd bought it for me at Target this morning while he was getting my WCM at Starbucks;

5. Todd is doing laundry, changing sheets, folding clothes (I've started calling him "Philip" as he's acting just like his father - and that's definitely not a bad thing);

6. Katie is cleaning the bathrooms. I mean really cleaning them. I have no doubt the toilets will be sparkling by the time she's done. She's listening to her iPod with headphones and we can hear her singing all through the house. If THAT doesn't bring a smile to one's lips, nothing will.

The only thing missing is Taylor. He left on Thursday afternoon to drive to Cincinnati with our youth minister and several other kids for a Youth Leadership Conference. I have to admit, this was an extremely difficult thing for me. Over the last couple years I've been ignoring this nagging feeling, but I can deny it no longer. I'm afraid I'm one of those moms. You know the kind. The type that has a hard time letting go. He's going to be 15 in April and I want him to experience all the wonderful things that go along with that age. (The wonderful good and legal things) But at the same time I want to hold on to him and keep him here with me all the time. Except that when he's been here too long he drives me nuts! LOL Oh, what a parental conundrum. I suppose I could just blame my frenzied hormones for my irrational and conflicted emotions. Or I could also assume that this is just life. My confused feelings on the subject of my children growing up are probably no different than any other mother's.

Todd wanted me to say that between running his hectic department at work and managing the household, he hasn't had time to review my postings for corrective comments to my mundane ramblings. I should take this opportunity to post things about him since he won't be reading anything, but nothing's coming to mind at the moment.

Mused by Jenster :: 11:07 AM :: 5 People musing:

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Friday, January 19, 2007

Isn't it Ironic??

Back in September I posted a blurb about freaking out over the "Snow Emergency Route" signs they have plastered all around here. They sell snow pants at the local Target and Kohl's and snow shovels at the grocery store. I've never lived anywhere with these things. So I've been anticipating/dreading/hoping/dreading winter in Southeast Pennsylvania. What have I experienced so far? Frustration! That's what. It's comical that places like Southern California and Southern Texas have had more of a winter than we have.

Supposedly winter hit yesterday. Yeah, it's been cold and yeah, it snowed last night. But it's already gone and it's nearing 40 now. All this makes me wonder two things. One - will we really get a good snow this year? Two - is Father Winter storing up for next year, making 2007/2008 one of the worst winters in history? I guess I'm just going to have to wait and see.

Another Irony

I haven't posted much because everything I thought to write about just made me sound whiney. Which would have been an accurate impression. But I have to write about this and honestly, it's my blog so I can write whatever I want to. Gosh! (Rowena - that was for you)

I've already established my problem with overactive hormones and the fact this will mean a hysterectomy. What I found out yesterday is that my oncologist wants me to have a Zoladex injection in two weeks to shut things down until I can have that hysterectomy.

In the past 20 months I've been told repeatedly how brave and strong I am. I'm not so sure I'm any braver or stronger than anyone else, but I will admit I'm not a wimp. And so there's no misunderstanding, I credit any strength or bravery to God's grace.

I was shocked and overwhelmed when I was given a 95% probability of having cancer. But I wasn't truly scared.

I was a bit nervous about having a mastectomy, but I knew I'd be blissfully unaware and I wasn't truly scared.

I was somewhat anxious about my first chemotherapy treatment, not knowing how it would feel or what side effects I would have to deal with, but I wasn't truly scared.

I grieved the day Todd left for Pennsylvania, knowing the separation was going to be the hardest part of my trial, but I wasn't truly scared.

I was actually more excited than anything about having reconstruction, even though I knew it was going to be quite a recovery - so I wasn't truly scared.

But I am scared to death of having that Zoladex injection in two weeks. It's not dangerous or life threatening. It's not like having a part of my body cut off or moved and placed somewhere else. It's not like being pumped with several gallons of poisonous chemicals. Really. It should not be so scary!

However, the plain, sad truth of it is that it's going to hurt. And I'm afraid it's going to hurt something fierce. The nurse will pinch my already extremely tender belly, stick a large needle into the gathered flesh, and insert what looks like a 1/2 inch long piece of toothpick. The waistband on my very large sweatpants hurts my tummy right now. How is all that going to feel??

I guess I've found my Achilles Heel. PLECH!

Reading

I finished Book of the Seven Delights last night. I love Betina Krahn. This is the fifth book of hers that I've read and she hasn't failed to deliver yet. As I mentioned before, the setting is rather unusual - Morocco in the late 1800's, early 1900's. Kind of reminded me of The Mummy - one of my favorite movies. All the BK books I've read so far have been rated PG-13, maybe even PG, and I find that refreshing. She tells a great story, there's definite tension between the characters, the kisses are sizzling, but she doesn't go into detail. She leaves that up to the reader's imagination. lol

I brought Darkfever by Karen Marie Moning downstairs with me to start today, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

Mused by Jenster :: 12:20 PM :: 8 People musing:

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Monday, January 15, 2007

I'm Just Too Much Woman, Hairy Legs Notwithstanding

Because I was 39 when I started chemotherapy, the "chemopause" (chemically induced menopause) was assumed to be permanent. Both my oncologist and my gynecologist told me the chances of me having another period were very slim.

Last March while the kids and I were visiting Todd over spring break, I started menstruating. The presence of a period meant my ovaries had started producing estrogen again. This is totally unacceptable because my cancer was highly estrogen positive - meaning the tumor was fed by estrogen. So I underwent six monthly injections of a hormone suppressor (Zoladex). The purpose of this injection was to make my ovaries "shrivel and die".

Hot flashes, night sweats and the lack of Aunt Flow indicated the mission had been accomplished. Until yesterday. Apparently I'm just so much woman that the only way to stop the madness is to yank those puppies out.

Todd had observed just the other day that I hadn't had a hot flash in a few weeks, but I just attributed it to surgery and blessed narcotics. I'm not much of a crier, however, I've been incredibly weepy of late. I even got all choked up during a "Dream Girls" commercial. Why? There was nothing terribly moving about the commercial. Maybe I was crying because I want to look like Beyonce. I don't know.

What I do know is this means a hysterectomy at some point in the very near future. Yup. Another surgery. How lucky can a girl get??

READING

I started reading The Book of Seven Delights by Betina Krahn yesterday. I'm intrigued by the fact that it takes place in Morocco at the turn of the 20th century - not an oft written about time period or place. I also love her style. Her Test series is among my favorites and the one other BK book I've read, The Perfect Mistress, was just so funny. I have the next book in this series, The Book of True Desires, and I understand from Tara that it's an unusual setting and great read as well.

Mused by Jenster :: 12:05 PM :: 10 People musing:

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Saturday, January 13, 2007

Two Weeks Out

My surgery was two weeks ago yesterday. While my recovery is progressing along nicely, I'm tired of being an invalid. In fact, I'm tired of a lot of things.

I'm tired of a lousy complexion. Anesthesia always does this to me. No matter how often I wash my face it still feels icky. Tiny, little bumps all over my forehead and cheeks. There's nothing I can do about it because it's systemic and will have to work it's way out. It will eventually go away. This always happens after I've been put under. And I'm sure the fact that I was under anesthesia for 8 hours will just prolong it.

I'm tired of having hairy legs. Really, how do men do it? I find it disgusting. I think I may actually try shaving today. Even if I only get 50% dethatching, it's still better than the way it is now.

I'm tired of having hairy armpits. This is actually worse than the hairy legs. I can tell you with the utmost certainty that I could never go European. This I will have to endure a little bit longer as my arms don't go up or across enough to do anything about it. I can't shave my left underarm anyway - never will be able to - because I had lymph nodes removed when I had my mastectomy. I'm considering laser hair removal eventually, but I've a feeling that will cost a bit more green than I'm willing to part with. In the meantime I'll just continue to Veet. Or I will as soon as I'm able.

I'm tired of a limited reach. And I really hate the rubberband-snapping-my-phantom-nipple feeling I get when I move the wrong way. If you can't imagine what that's like, just try it. Not pleasant.

I'm tired of needing a nap after my shower. This unfortunate reality is giving me horrible bed head because I fall asleep in the chair with damp hair and wake up with a punk rock style. I am glad, however, that I can shower myself now.

I'm tired of wondering what all this is going to end up looking like. Too bad for me because I'll be wondering for a while. At some point I'll have some revisions done as parts of me look like a child's poor attempt at sewing. Not to worry, though. I've been assured by several woman who have had this same surgery that the plastic surgeon will do a little lipo here, insert a little collagen there, laser that flap of incision, etc. I just hope all this gets done before our trip to Hawaii in June. I would really like to take a Dixie and Daisy I can be proud of, though probably nobody would know the difference anyway.

I'm tired of a few other things that, believe it or not, I find too personal to post. You can let your imaginations run wild, but you're probably wrong. LOL

There are some things I'm very happy about, though. For example - I slept in my bed last night for the first time since my surgery. It was divine if for no other reason than the fact that I could reach my hairy toe out and touch Todd's hairy toe any time I wanted to.

Our decision to buy this house in this neighborhood has been affirmed several times over since we moved in, but not as much as right now. Quite a few of the ladies have organized meals and every evening somebody brings us a delicious dinner. My family hasn't eaten this good since, well... um... let me see... I guess since we lived with my parents that month before we moved up here.

I love how I can ask either one of my kids to do something for me and I don't get the whiney, "do I have to" that seems to be standard among most children. Instead I get an almost enthusiastic, "Sure!" I realize this is temporary and I'm enjoying it while I can.

I'm liking watching Todd iron his pants and shirts for work. Since the running of the house is pretty much my job I usually do his ironing. But it's nice to know he can do it if he has to.

The best part is probably the guilt-free reading/computer time I have. Though I'm not at full concentration because I used to be able to sit and read a book completely through. Now I can only read a couple chapters before I have to stop for a little bit.

All in all things are going very well and every day is a little better than the day before. I see my plastic surgeon on January 31 and I guess we'll go from there.

Mused by Jenster :: 3:02 PM :: 6 People musing:

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Thursday, January 11, 2007

What I Read Last Year

2006 was the first year I started keeping a reading log. It's fun to go back and see how many books I read and what I thought about each one, etc. It wasn't one of my better years as far as reading goes. I only read 44 books for the entire year. I would say that's at least only half - probably closer to a third - of what I used to read.

Here is what I read, broken down by month:

January - 7 books

A Breath of Snow and Ashes - Diana Gabaldon
Unleash the Night - Sherrilyn Kenyon
Storm Front - Jim Butcher
Damsel in This Dress - Marianne Stillings
The Dark Queen - Susan Carroll
Midnight Marriage - Victoria Bylin
The Charmer - Celeste Bradley

February - 5 books

The Wife Test - Betina Krahn
A Bride Most Begruding - Deeanne Gist
The Kitchen Boy - Robert Alexander
The Rogue - Celeste Bradley
The Courtesan - Susan Carroll

March - 4 books

Rasputin's Daughter - Robert Alexander
Flowers from the Storm - Laura Kinsale
Touched by Time - Leanne Shawler
Life Expectancy - Dean Koontz

April - 6 books

The Silver Rose - Susan Carroll
It Happened One Autumn - Lisa Kleypas
Devil in Winter - Lisa Kleypas
The Marriage Test - Betina Krahn
Lord Perfect - Loretta Chase
Lady Anne's Dangerous Man - Jean Westin

May - 4 books

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evie - Marianne Stillings
Much Ado in the Moonlight - Lynn Kurland
The Secret Pearl - Mary Balogh
Only with a Highlander - Janet Chapman

June - 2 books

The Trouble with Harry - Katie McAlister
Dark Side of the Moon - Sherrilyn Kenyon

July - 2 books

Leading Ladies' Anthology - various Draumr Publishing Authors
The Future Widows' Club - Rhonda Nelson

August - 5 books

The Other Boleyn Girl - Philippa Gregory
Scandal in Spring - Lisa Kleypas
On the Way to the Wedding - Julia Quinn
The Measure of a Lady - Deeanne Gist
Whence Came a Prince - Liz Curtis Higgs

September - 3 books

Fool Moon - Jim Butcher
Viscount Vagabond - Loretta Chase
The Devil's Delilah - Loretta Chase

October - 2 books

Where Dreams Begin - Lisa Kleypas
Sighs Matter - Marianne Stillings

November - 2 books

The Lion's Daughter - Loretta Chase
Eragon - Christopher Paolini

December - 2 books

Lady of Sin - Madeline Hunter
Dreaming of You - Lisa Kleypas

I'm one of those people who would make a horrible, and I mean HORRIBLE, book critic because I pretty much enjoy everything I read. I started to make comments on all the books, but I figured that would make this post much too long, which it probably already is anyway. So - if you have any questions about any of the books I read, let me know. Otherwise just know that I liked all the books - some more than others - but still thought they were all worth my time.

Mused by Jenster :: 11:18 AM :: 9 People musing:

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Sunday, January 07, 2007

New Year's Resolutions

I know I'm about a week late, but honestly - I was in no position to be posting anything a week ago. lol.

I don't usually make resolutions because I'm the world's biggest procrastinator and unfinisher of things already started. Case in point - Baylie's baby quilt. When my friend, Beth, was pregnant with her second child I started making a quilt for the baby. It was a simple Trip Around the World pattern and I wrapped up a small section I had already completed and gave it to Beth at her baby shower. After the shower I took it back so I could finish the quilt. Baylie is 9. The quilt top has been finished for a few years. I have yet to put the backing on and complete the project.

That may be an extreme example, but it's an example nonetheless. And the reason I don't usually make resolutions. I find they're just a setup for failure.

This year is different, though. There are two things - big things - I want to accomplish this year. And to accomplish these things will require a degree of discipline I haven't seen in ages. Makes me wish I was my sister-in-law Rachel. She's the most organized and disciplined person I've ever known. I really wish she lived nearby if for no other reason than to pass on these characteristics by osmosis. Okay. I wish she lived nearby for other, more frivolous reasons, but I'll save those reasons for another, more mushy type post.

1 - I want to get a better hold of our finances. Not that they're in a bad way or anything. They're not. I would just like to finesse our budget a little and watch the money a little closer. What worked for us when we lived in Arkansas doesn't necessarily work for us here in Pennsylvania. The cost of living is different and we have to be a little more careful than we used to be.

2 - I'm going to finish writing my book. Now that I've had reconstruction I'm pretty much at the end of my story. And it shouldn't be hard to write. Most of it has already been written in either emails or diaries or posts. It's more a matter of organizing the data and polishing it into a coherent, cohesive narrative. What I need to do is set aside a certain amount of time each day to concentrate and work on the MS. No blogging, no email, no message boards, no TV, no reading, no anything.

Now that I've publicly declared my intentions I'm hoping I'll feel compelled to stick with these resolutions. I guess this was my way of making myself accountable. Though I have very little pride and this sort of thing hasn't worked in the past. lol

Mused by Jenster :: 12:48 PM :: 10 People musing:

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Saturday, January 06, 2007

Moles and Panties

To make sense out of this post you need to know what exactly my surgery entailed. Most of you probably already know, but I'm going to explain it one more time, just in case.

In May of 2005 I had a left modified radical mastectomy which left me with an 8-inch scar running from the center of my chest to half way under my arm. Because of my fairly young age at diagnosis and the further risk factors, I elected to have a prophylactic right mastectomy along with what they call DEIP reconstruction.

Last Friday a surgical oncologist removed my right breast by simple, skin sparing mastectomy. When she was finished the plastic/vascular surgeon removed the tissue from my belly, including an artery from each side, and did a transfer.

First, he basically "stuffed" the right breast with belly tissue and connected an artery so it will have an actual blood supply. But for the left breast he used not only the fat, but some of the skin from the belly to create a breast.

So with that little bit of explaination I'll continue...

I didn't actually get to see the "girls" for a few days, but when I did I had to laugh. My left breast now has a mole that used to be on my belly. Kind of weird, that.

And how's this for humiliation? I was told I should have underwear that wouldn't hit the incision or be too tight. So when we got home from the hospital my Father-in-Law ran to the store to buy me some "double wide, extra saggy, granny panties". My Father-in-Law!! How embarrassing! Todd was going to pin a pair to the bulletin board and take a picture so I could post it with the phrase, "Who's panties are on the bulletin board?" (You know, like on Gray's Anatomy) But I decided against it. Tell you about my humongous panties and showing you are two different things.

Mused by Jenster :: 10:37 AM :: 7 People musing:

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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

What I Wanted and What I Got


This is what I had hoped to look like after surgery on Friday. (Carmen Electra, in case you can't see the photo well)








This is much closer to reality





I was unhooked from everything today except I did come home with three drain tubes. YUCK! So there is no misunderstanding, I HATE drain tubes. But I'm hoping to get them out by the end of the week.

Today I had my first shower since last Thursday. It was divine!

I'm not supposed to lay flat so I'm going to be sleeping in TODD'S green chair for a little while.

Okay. I'm tired now! Good to be back, though. I'm looking forward to doing some major bloghopping over the next few days. Thank you all for your well wishes and prayers!

Mused by Jenster :: 9:17 PM :: 14 People musing:

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